Alright, Pinheads, brace your kidneys. Railway Barber Shop is summoning another oddball spectacle. We’re creating the first ever Wapper-Jaw Pinball Throwdown, a tournament so crooked it walks in circles and manically laughs about it.

What is a Wapper-Jaw?

Who knows. Who cares. It’s the kind of word you mutter after eating gas station sushi at 2AM or after watching a grown man head-butt a pinball machine because “the multi-ball felt disrespectful.” It’s ridiculousness with a crooked grin. That’s what it is.

And where better than Railway Barber Shop, the location of Loveland’s unofficial pinball speakeasy, tucked behind the clippers and hot lather like a secret society of pinball obsessed weirdos. 

We’ve cooked up a list of rule twists so diabolical they make the Devil check the warranty.

Ever played pinball with swaths of the playfield as blacked out and redacted as the Epstein files? Ever tried to flip with a foot pedal like you're driving a tractor through a thunderstorm? Ever attempted “No Nudge,” the forbidden Zen mode? Or “No Tilt Bob,” the lawless frontier where anything goes and shame is optional?  This event promises to be as oddball as chess boxing.  Google it.

All of it is on the table.

The goal is simple: level the playfield. Pulverize the hierarchy. Melt the skill gap into a puddle on the shop floor. Whether you’re a hardcore Pinhead or a wide-eyed newbie who thinks “Comet” is a household cleaner, you’re all welcome. And you’re doomed.

Prizes? 

Absolutely. Do I know what they are yet? Not even a little. But there will be treasures, trinkets, trophies, or at least something shiny enough to make you say “Nice.” 

Food & Bev?

Of course.  

Entry Fee?

Maybe.

Date? TBD. We’re still wrangling calendars and consulting the ancient pinball spirits.

Full Disclosure:  This will be a completely non-profit event hosted by Railway Barber Shop.  Any and all donations, entry fee's, etc. will be used to cover any associated costs and to award a jackpot to an attendee (employee's of Railway excluded).

Stay tuned. The Wapper-Jaw is coming. In the meantime, play play play.